Learn How to Lead to Win

That’s from chapter-story-lesson #16.

After reading the front and back covers and some of the inspiring testimonials, I opened up to a random page and read THAT passage. And... I knew I needed to make it a Big Idea.

Your job? First... As per the introduction, know this: YOU ARE A LEADER. Period.

Whether you’re a parent or a grandparent or a coach or an HR executive or an addiction counselor or a teacher or ANYONE who has ONE person looking to them for guidance.

If you’re alive, at the VERY least, you are the Commanding Officer of YOUR OWN LIFE.

So... Start acting like it.

How? Well, let’s open up to Title 10 of the United States Code outlining the role of the US armed forces as we recognize the fact that ALL of us are engaged in the eternal battle between vice and virtue—the “great combat” as Socrates put it 2,500 years ago.

Chapter 511, Paragraph 5947 outlines the REQUIREMENTS OF EXEMPLARY CONDUCT (what a beautiful phrase!) for YOU, the Commanding Officer of your life.

Your job is to, and I quote: “promote and safeguard the morale, the physical well-being, and the general welfare of the officers and enlisted persons under their command or charge.”

After that passage above, Admiral Manazir says: “Here’s how Admiral Manager puts it: ‘In my case, that was some 350 people. I was the Morale Officer by law.’ From that moment on, with each command I had, my name tag read Morale Officer, right under my name. People would look at me funny and ask, ‘What the hell is that?’

I’d reply, ‘Let me tell you about that. Title 10 of the US Code says—’

Lots of people misinterpreted my name tags as indicating I was the ‘Fun Officer,’ in charge of making people happy. It’s not happiness that underpins high morale. Life in the military, especially deployed, is often not fun. It is about results. I was personally responsible for the operational results of my command.

I realized I’d get better results if morale in my command was high. I worked at motivating people to do their best, by rewarding them for results and celebrating those who achieved wins through individual efforts. They were more motivated—and more productive—when I let them do their jobs. When they were recognized for their achievements, it motivated them to do even better the next time. Everyone likes being on a winning team.”

Remember: You are the Commanding Officer of your life.

We have a moral obligation to “promote and safeguard the morale, the physical well-being, and the general welfare” of everyone in your charge—starting with YOURSELF.

I salute you, Morale Officer. LET’S GO.

P.S. As I read that passage about optimizing morale, I circled “celebrating” and thought of BJ Fogg. BJ tells us that the act of CELEBRATING our and other people’s success is HUGE. (Check out this +1 on How to Celebrate.) He says: “If there’s one concept from my book I hope you embrace, it’s this: People change best by feeling good, not by feeling bad.”

Welcome to story-chapter-lesson #1.

In this chapter, Admiral Manazir tells us about his disciplinarian Marine father (who also went to the Naval Academy and rarely took the time to praise) and his encouraging mother (who complimented his father’s style and was always there to celebrate).

Manazir had his life-changing epiphany attending the Navy-Georgia football game in the eighth grade. As it turns out, I had MY life-changing epiphany about what I wanted to do with my life when I was first introduced to Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits as a 20-year-old attending a leadership development event.

As a first-generation college student raised in a conservative blue-collar, Catholic family, Covey’s book opened my eyes to the astonishing possibility that we could DELIBERATELY create a life of deep meaning and service. My life today can be traced to that one event.

So... Do YOU have any life-defining moments you can celebrate?

And... What’s your CURRENT mission in life?

Covey’s wisdom to “Begin with the end in mind” is ALWAYS worth remembering.

He tells us: “‘Begin with the end in mind’ is based on the principle that all things are created twice. There’s a mental or first creation, and a physical or second creation to all things.”

This Covey wisdom is also always worth remembering: “I believe that a life of integrity is the most fundamental source of personal worth. I do not agree with the popular success literature that says that self-esteem is primarily a matter of mindset, of attitude—that you can psych yourself into peace of mind. Peace of mind comes when your life is in harmony with true principles and values and in no other way.”

P.S. At the end of most chapters, Admiral Manazir recommends a number of books. Here’s a list of the books he recommends that we have featured: Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, As a Man Thinketh by James Allen, The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership by John Maxwell, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, and The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer.

That’s from a chapter called “Think Ahead” in which we go through flight school with Mike—before he earned his wings and his Nasty call sign.

Get this... Before Mike went to the Navy’s flight school, he invested his own savings and went to his OWN flight school—earning a private flying license BEFORE he went through the grueling Navy training. THAT, my dear friend, is a perfect example of going the extra mile and going ALL IN while playing to win.

Btw. Any time I think of going the extra mile, I think of Jesus. More specifically, I think of the great Unity minister, Eric Butterworth and his great book, Discover the Power Within You.

He tells us: “The admonition to go the second mile relates to the right of the Roman soldiers in Jesus’ time to compel subject peoples to carry their burdens for one mile. It was the imposition of despotism, but the subject people could do nothing about it. Jesus indicates an uncommon-sense way of doing something about it. They could break their bonds of enslavement by doing what was demanded of them as if they really enjoyed doing it. And that doesn’t make sense, does it? ... When you go the second mile—give more to your work, are more thoughtful and kind to people, become a joyous giver and a gracious receiver—suddenly life takes on new meaning. On the second mile you find happiness, true friends, real satisfaction in living—and probably a larger pay check, too.”

I also think of some Jim Afremow wisdom from his great book, The Champion’s Comeback.

He tells us: “An uncompromising approach in training and continuous hustle in competition is vital to achieving sports-related goals. J.J. Watt is an NFL All-Pro defensive end for the Houston Texans. His willingness to embrace the extra effort required for excellence is one of the main reasons for his success. Here’s what Watt says about working hard and representing yourself well: ‘I think no matter what job you do—I don’t care what job it is—you want to outperform your contract. I feel like that’s how everybody should attack their job, at least. You should want people to think you’re underpaid because of how hard you work, because of how well you do your job, because of how you go about your business.’

Take a moment for honest self-reflection. Are you outperforming your contract? Are you attacking your job on a daily basis? What about in your sport? Are you one of the hardest workers on your team? Put in 100 percent maximum effort toward your goals and bring a passion to the work. Be willing to put in the blue-collar labor rather than wishing you had more talent so that everything would come easily. It never will. The great ones make it look easy, but only after they put in the time and work.”

Here’s to going ALL IN as we go the extra mile and outperform our contracts, Hero!

P.S. One of the things I found most powerful about the book was Admiral Manazir’s humility and willingness to share the number of times he made SIGNIFICANT mistakes—and how he learned from them every time. In a chapter called “Fight the Fear—Keep Moving Forward,” he tells us about a “night in the barrel” in which he failed to land his jet on an aircraft carrier SEVEN TIMES. He was almost out of fuel and another miss would have meant him ejecting out and sending a perfectly good $75 million (!) jet into the depths of the ocean. :/

He tells us: “I am convinced that courage is not defined by the absence of fear. It is defined by what we do with our fears. I believe a hero is someone who keeps their courage one second longer than the person next to them. You have to face the fear and step into it.”

That leadership lesson is from a chapter called “Change Lives—Plant Seeds of Possibilities.” The powerful story from which that lesson is extracted goes something like this...

It’s May 1995. Nasty is in a nasty dog fight 50 miles Northeast of Key West. He’s in his F-14D Tomcat, going head to head against Major Ragan “Hornet” Nicholl who was with the Florida Air Guard out of Homestead Air Force Base near Miami and flying an F-15C Eagle. Hornet got behind Nasty’s “wing line in a gun solution” and he was “dead.” They followed that first round up with another run at it. This time Nasty got the best of Hornet. Then they went at it one more time and finished even. Awesome.

And... Although Nasty tells the story so you feel like you’re up in the air with him, that wasn’t quite the point of the story.

This is... Rewind thirteen years. It’s February 1985. Nasty and his wife, Kelly, had just moved into a new home in Escondido, California.

A young, blond-haired cable guy cruises in to set up their cable. Mr. Cable Guy admires some pictures Nasty has on his living room wall—featuring him flying some Tomcats.

They have a little chat about those pictures and Nasty tells him that if he has a degree from college, he can walk into any Navy recruiter’s office and ask for a pilot slot in the Officer Candidate School.

To which Mr. Cable Guy says, “Cool.” Then you know what he does? He immediately drives to the nearest Navy recruiter’s office. He’s told they don’t have any slots available. Bummer. Then you know what he does? He walks into an Air Force recruiting office. They take him right away.

That Cable Guy? That’s Hornet. (Goosebumps.)

The moral of the story? Our job as leaders is to show people what’s possible, help them see their own potential and encourage them along the way. Our job as aspiring Heroes is to be like that young Hornet and seize the opportunities that present themselves to us. Let’s do that. TODAY.

P.S. Walt Whitman once said, “In the faces of men and women, I see God.” ← I love that. I like to say: “In the faces of men and women, I see Heroes.” ← Do you?

Those are the final words of the book.

Of course, when I read the line about Mike’s perspective that “Your leadership success will ultimately rise or fall on the strength of your daily disciplines,” I thought of our Heroic app.

So... Who are you at your Heroic best? What are YOUR daily disciplines?

Here’s to leading ourselves first and creating the strength for two such that we can weather any storm and emerge stronger as we give the world all we’ve got and... LEAD TO WIN!