Coaching the Mental Game
Leadership Philosophies and Strategies for Peak Performance in Sports and Everyday Life
Harvey Dorfman was one of the world’s leading mental training experts. Major League Baseball described him as a “pioneering sports psychologist.” He earned World Series rings as the mental skills coach for both the Oakland A’s and Florida Marlins. In this book, he covers the A to Z of mental discipline. Big Ideas we explore include Carpe momentum (seize the task at hand!), the peak performance cycle (approach + results + response), the blind men (and their elephant), and Percussus Resurgo (“Struck down. I rise again!”).
Big Ideas
- Carpe Momentum — Seize The Task at HandExecute the task at hand.
- Approach → Result → ResponseApproach → Result → Response.
- The Blind Men and The ElephantAnd the elephant.
- You and your donkeyQuit trying to make everyone happy.
- Percussus Resurgo“Struck down. I rise again.”
- Z is for ZealPut a saddle on and ride it.
“It’s agreed upon ‘within the ranks’: coaches do influence players’ performance, for better or for worse. The nature of the influence is determined by the substance and style of the coach’s delivery: what a coach says; how and when he or she says it. Who he or she is—as a coach and as a person.
Having acknowledged this, effective coaches strive to understand how best to know themselves and their athletes. How to communicate with their players. How to instruct, direct, and lead. How to ‘connect’ in ways that will enhance the athlete and his or her performance. This connection implies a focus that goes well beyond Xs and Os. Beyond the physical tactics and fundamental mechanics of the sport.
The coach should therefore have an understanding of the athlete’s mental makeup and develop appropriate coaching strategies aimed at helping a player’s mental approach to performance. Every coach I’ve ever spoken to recognizes the relationship between the athlete’s mental approach and performance. Yet few coaches devote specific time to that aspect of the game. I have asked many of them to tell me why.
The reason/excuse I’ve heard is a universal one: ‘I don’t have the time.’ The truth I hear less frequently: ‘I don’t know where to start.’ Perhaps this book will give impetus and direction for that start.”
~ H. A. Dorfman from Coaching the Mental Game
Harvey Dorfman was one of the world’s leading mental training experts.
Major League Baseball described him as a “pioneering sports psychologist.” He earned World Series rings as the mental skills coach for both the Oakland A’s and Florida Marlins.
I got this book because I love all things mental toughness and I’m having fun seeing if we can get through *all* the best books on how to train our minds. This is a nice addition to our collection of mental training books. We now have 20+ of the best books on how to get your mind right.
Elite athletes and coaches agree that, once we’ve attained a baseline of physical mastery, peak performance is mostly mental. Yet, very few coaches focus on the mental side of the game in their training. I love Dorfman’s point that most simply don’t know where to start.
Dorfman is a classic, old-school coach—a blend of the two coaches he references the most in his book: John Wooden and Vince Lombardi.
The book features an A to Z list on all things mental toughness for both the coach *and* the athlete—providing a ton of wisdom to Optimize. (Get a copy here.)
Of course, the book is packed with Big Ideas. I’m excited to explore a few of my favorites so let’s jump straight in!
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Download PDFI always stress condition with my basketball players. I don’t mean physical condition only. You cannot attain and maintain physical condition unless you are morally and mentally conditioned.
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Listen to the PodcastCarpe Momentum — Seize The Task at Hand
“Keeping it simple means knowing what matters and what does not matter. That is what Einstein meant. Quite often, however, athletes tend to complicate their world with their needs, their fears, their desire to succeed. My expressed view to them is that sport is simple; people are complicated. Many of them tend to think that there must be more to the game than executing a task successfully. In terms of behavior, there is not. Each singular execution of task has a ‘perfect simplicity [that] is audacious’ (George Meredith).
The greatest truths are the simplest, and so are the greatest athletes. Not simple-minded, but simple in their approach. They think small; they are focused on task. They do not allow extraneous issues and circumstances to take them out of their game plan—which is simply to attack and execute.
All big thoughts are unmanageable, out of a performer’s control. Carpe momentum. The moment, the now must be seized.
Living in and for the moment makes it easier for the athlete to adapt to situations as they change. His focus is narrow; the requirements are limited to that time and space. All attention is concentrated on executing the next task: a shot, a block, a stroke. He can understand that; he can control that. It is small and elemental. That task at hand is his exclusive concern, and always should be.”
Tons of goodness in there.
First, here’s the Einstein gem Harvey is referring to: “Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.”
And, as I’ve said many times, most authors come back to the same words or phrases again and again. One of the phrases most often repeated in this book? Execute the task at hand.
That’s really the essence of peak performance. And, for that matter, of enlightenment.
Spiritual gurus like Eckhart Tolle tell us about The Power of Now. While Byron Katie tells us that “We never receive more than we can handle, and there is always just one thing to do.”
“Now what needs to get done?” Or, as Michael Phelps puts it “What’s important now?”
EXECUTE THE TASK AT HAND!!!
← Disciplining our mind so THAT is our exclusive focus is what it’s all about.
Which leads us to yet another take on our Carpe diem theme. I picked up “Carpe punctum” from Dan Millman to capture the fact that we can only seize the moment.
But I’m kinda diggin’ “Carpe momentum.”
It captures both the need to focus on the moment AND the fact that, when we do, we create MOMENTUM. With Mr. Mo in the house things tend to go our way so…
Want momentum? Be in the moment.
Execute the task at hand. Again and again and again.
I continue to follow Oliver Wendell Holmes’s advice that if there is something worth saying, say it over and over, ‘of course in a little different form each time.’
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.
Approach → Result → Response
“The approach leads to a result. A good approach had a much better chance of producing the desired result. However, this is not an inherent guarantee in competition. An athlete may execute a fine shot, a great pass, a perfect pitch. But other factors cause a bad result: the wind takes the ball off its path; the great pass is dropped; the hitter flails at the perfect pitch and hits a lame duck just over the infielder’s outstretched arm. Results cannot be controlled.
But the performer can control the approach. Always. He can’t control what happens after the task has been executed. He executed effectively; he should repeat his effective behavior instead of concerning himself with what the result was.
I tell every athlete that he defines himself by the way he approaches his competitive task. His plan, his poise, his intensity, his aggressiveness, his focus. His breathing pattern, his tempo, his body language. That is behavior. That is approach.
Directly related, and as important, is the athlete’s response.”
Dorfman tells us there are three facets to performance that continually repeat themselves as we focus on executing the next task: approach + results + response.
We have absolute control over two of those components: Our approach. And our response.
The results? We can, of course, INFLUENCE them, but we cannot, of course, CONTROL them.
Remember Apollo—our patron saint of philosophy? He should also be the patron saint of elite athletes. Apollo is an archer. He does his best to shoot his arrow straight. Then, he lets go of results. And, hit or miss, he responds optimally and begins his next approach. Let’s be like that.
And, let’s embody Dorfman’s wisdom on how to Optimize our response. When something doesn’t go the way we want, he says we should ask three questions: “What was I trying to do?” “What went wrong?” “What do I want to do next time?”
(That’s kinda like our “Needs work!” approach.)
The cycle: Approach. Results. Response.
Repeat. Forever. :)
Anxiety about outcome is the single most intrusive inhibitor to effective performance.
The future you shall know when it has come; before then, forget it.
The Blind Men and The Elephant
“‘The Blind Men and the Elephant,’ a poetic parable written by John Godfrey Saxe, tells of six learned blind men who went to see an elephant ‘That each by observation / might satisfy his mind.’ Each man approached the elephant from a different angle; each felt a different part of the animal; each had a different ‘observation.’ The one feeling the trunk claimed the elephant was ‘very like a snake.’ The one feeling the tail thought the animal to be like a rope. The one feeling the knee thought it like a tree and so on.
The poem ends, ‘And so these men of Indostan / Disputed loud and long, / Each in his own opinion / Exceeding stiff and strong. / Though each was partly in the right. / They all were in the wrong!’”
Have you ever heard about the blind men and the elephant?
We talked about it in Big Mind Big Heart in the context of having a “right view” of the world. It’s an ancient parable that brings home an important point.
Let’s take a moment to imagine six blind guys who cruise up to an elephant. Each touches a different part of the elephant’s body and is certain that his perspective is the right one.
The guy touching the elephant’s side? Yep. The elephant is like a wall. The one touching the tail? The elephant is like a rope. O B V I O U S L Y. Trunk? It’s like a snake! Duh. Tusk? Like a spear! Of course. Etc.
The moral of the story?
All of the blind guys have a PARTIAL truth. But, unfortunately, they don’t see that their truth is only partially correct. They mistake their limited perspective for the WHOLE truth.
Oops. That’s when we get in trouble—when we fail to step back and see the big picture. Ken Wilber tells us that no one is smart enough to be 100% right. OR 100% wrong.
There’s *always* a partial truth to EVERY perspective.
If we want to Optimize our relationships with others—whether that’s in an everyday discussion with our spouse or a political debate with our relatives/friends/colleagues who might have voted for someone else—we’d be REALLY wise to start by a) recognizing we aren’t 100% right (about anything!) and b) they aren’t 100% wrong (about anything!).
With that humility, we move on to c) and start by trying to see from their perspective—honoring the partial truth as they see it. We begin our interactions from THAT vantage point of mutual understanding then work our way to the edges of potential disagreement.
Here’s how Genpo Roshi puts it in Big Mind: “That is why from the beginning it’s really important that you learn to shift perspectives. That alone is going to help tremendously in your life. Just imagine the next time you get into an argument with your partner or spouse, and you are able to let go of your view and open up to the possibility that there might just be another perspective on the situation—her view, or his view. The moment you do that, it sets you free.”
So… Let’s remember: We’re all more like those blind guys than we’d like to admit.
Question: What issue is getting under your skin these days? Something you’re SURE you’re 100% right about? Can you step back a bit, see that you might not be quite at the 100% correct position and that those with whom you’re in disagreement might not be at 0%?
Fantastic. Good first step. Now, work out your perspective-building muscles today and keep the blind guys in mind the next time you feel your 100% right-ness bubbling back up.
‘Isn’t that normal?’ I’ve been asked many times, after having admonished an athlete for his poor performance. It is, yes, but to be ‘normal’—ordinary—should not be the goal of any competitive athlete. Exceptional is the goal; normal is the excuse.
Do not consider painful what is best for you.
You and your donkey
“I’m reminded of a story that made a strong impression on me when I read it as a child. It is about a young boy and his father, who are bringing a donkey they wish to sell to a market three towns away from their home. They begin the trip with the father walking, as he holds the rope around the animal’s neck. The son rides the donkey. As they go through their town, the father hears people say, ‘Look at that; the old man is forced to walk by a selfish son with young legs.’ The father and son switch positions.
They walk on and soon hear the townspeople of the adjacent hamlet say, ‘Look at that; a small young thing forced to walk, while a strong man rides.’ Father and son mount the donkey and both ride into the next town.
There they hear, ‘Isn’t that inhumane! Two people burdening that poor, dumb animal. What insensitive cruelty.’ The father thinks for a moment. He then purchases a long bamboo pole and a length of heavy rope. The father and son tie the donkey’s legs to the pole, then lift it onto their shoulders.
They walk into the next town carrying the upside down animal. ‘Look at those fools, carrying a donkey.’
The most certain way to ensure failure in this world of ours is to try to please everyone.”
I love parables and that’s another good one.
It’s from the N is for “Nice Person” section. As in, be careful thinking you can ever make *everyone* happy. Because, news flash: You can’t.
Emerson’s wisdom comes in handy here: “What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule, equally arduous in actual and in intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness.”
How can you apply that wisdom to your life today?
P.S. How about another great little parable involving a bamboo pole AND an elephant AND mental training?! In The Great Work of Your Life, Stephen Cope tells us about this story told to Gandhi as a young boy to help him train his mind: “‘But the wise elephant trainer,’ said Rambha, ‘will give the elephant a stick of bamboo to hold in his trunk. The elephant likes this. He holds it fast. And as soon as the elephant wraps his trunk around the bamboo, the trunk begins to settle. Now the elephant strides through the market like a prince: calm, collected, focused, serene. Bananas and coconuts no longer distract.’”
← Moral of that story? Don’t let your mind wander like an elephant. Give it a stick to hold on to. A mantra that keeps you centered and focused.
Confidence is that feeling by which the mind embarks in great and honorable courses with a sure hope and trust in itself.
Percussus Resurgo
“I’ve seen athletes who battled through adversity, working to find a way to get it done. They appeared to be hanging on with suction cups. Japanese athletes describe the quality as gambate—working hard, never giving up.
Sometimes the suction cups don’t hold. But, as Lombardi was fond of saying, it’s not about how many times a person falls; it’s about how many times he gets up. Dorothy Fields wrote the lyrics for a 1936 Jerome Kern tune that I first heard on the radio when I was a very young boy. The song begins:
Now nothing’s impossible, I have found, For when my chin is on the ground. I pick myself up, dust myself off, And start all over again.
I read these words as an adult: Percussus resurgo—‘Struck down, I rise again!’ And again.”
That’s from a chapter on Relentlessness.
It features my new favorite Latin phrase: Percussus resurgo. “Struck down. I rise again.”
Which reminds me of Mrs. Grit, Angela Duckworth: “There’s an old Japanese saying: ‘Fall seven, rise eight.’ If I were ever to get a tattoo, I’d get these four simple words indelibly inked.”
Which goes nicely with the Japanese word ganbatte (or gambate). Think: “Hang in there!” Like suction cups. (Hah.)
Relentlessness is also featured in Jason Selk’s admonition to have a “relentless solution focus.” 60 seconds of whining is permitted. Then back to solution-mode. And, one of the most oft-used phrases of my coach Phil Stutz is his reminder that it’s all about relentless forward motion.
Percussus resurgo. Struck down? Rise again. And again. And again.
Relentlessness is the reciprocal of quitting—yielding—giving up. It is an aggressive, persistent, attack-mode attitude. It defines a warrior. The relentless performer gives himself intensely, entirely, and constantly to competition.
You ought to run the hardest when you feel the worst.
Z is for Zeal
“What a great place for me to complete the body of this book: in the soul of the athlete who loves to compete, who is joyous in his participation, fervent in his desire to be a winner.
Zeal: ‘enthusiastic devotion to a cause, ideal, or goal and tireless diligence in its furtherance’ (The American Heritage Dictionary). Terms and phrases I’ve used to describe some of the true competitors I’ve been lucky enough to coach or counsel have been: enthusiasm, vitality, energy, joyousness, spirit, passion—fire in the belly.
These athletes bring enthusiasm to practice and performance; vitality to their learning and the growth of their teammates; energy to every activity, cerebral or physical; joy that crowds a gymnasium or a locker room; spirit that soars. …
Many factors contribute to success and zeal makes a significant contribution. But zeal has to be informed by intelligence, controlled by self-discipline.
I’ve often told athletes who were too zealous that if we looked out at a field filled with spirited, swift thoroughbred horses, they would make a beautiful picture as they ran wild—‘But they won’t win a race without a bit and bridle.’ Their spirit shouldn’t be broken, but it must be controlled. Unbridled spirit is not enough for a competitor.
Without proper control of his thought patterns and his body, the athlete’s zeal can become exuberant dysfunction. The Greeks said it 2,500 years ago: ‘Nothing in excess.’ They advocated a proper balance. Maintained with consistency, I’d add.”
Z is for Zeal.
It’s the engine of awesome.
In fact, we ended our last Note on Wired to Create with Emerson’s declaration that nothing great was ever created without zeal’s synonym: enthusiasm!
And… That zeal needs to be grounded and consistently channeled in the right direction if we want to see just how far it can take us. Think of that wild thoroughbred. Beautiful to watch run wild. But not going to win a race until that raw energy has been focused.
So… How do you show up? Do you need to dial up your zeal? Or do you need to ground it in discipline? (Or a little of both?)
All this comes from vitality (vita = life), the zeal that directs the best in us toward the goals we’ve set for ourselves.
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